Typical of media-only events, Nintendo's recent Media Summit offered a healthy dose of lecture-style presentations punctuated by a few goof-off shenanigans to get us all in the mood (i.e. "it's good to be Wii") followed by some quality time with forthcoming games that maybe nobody's seen yet, so we feel honored, privileged, manipulated into bringing such hallowed hands-on experiences to the masses.

Here's what we were sucked in to telling you about:


Guitar Hero On Tour (DS)
From the first whispers, this one plain just sounded like wishful thinking; Guitar Hero for the Nintendo DS? But sure enough, On Tour uses a peripheral controller-grip that jacks into your DS, providing the equivalent of the colored fret buttons on larger-console iterations of Guitar Hero (you even get a "guitar pick" stylus to literally strum the virtual guitar strings on the touch-sensitive screen). In addition to the more-or-less recognizable gameplay, On Tour offers a wireless Guitar Duel mode that features "battle item" power-ups unique to the DS, as well as some clever functionality (one battle item sets your opponent's guitar afire, obliging him to put out the flames by blowing on the DS microphone, while another temporarily obscures his screen with fans' posters and T-shirts that require him to scrawl his signature with the DS stylus/pick). The most diverse set-list of songs to date for a Guitar Hero title rounds out this portable rocker, which will be available in Summer 2008.

 

Wii Fit (Wii)
The Wii Balance board, Body-Mass Index checks, exercise? What is this? For one, it might be the thing that puts a serious cramp in our ever-so-formerly-reliable, out-of-shape gamer-dweeb jokes, at least for a while. It may look wrong from an observer's perspective, but the Wii Fit Balance board is an ingenious (and from what we've seen, surprisingly durable) control device that gives players control in four main categories of activities that can often, but not always, be properly termed "games," i.e., Strength Training, Yoga, Aerobics and Balance. None of it is as easy as it looks, whether it's hula-ing a virtual hoop around your waist, skiing or snowboarding, carefully tipping an onscreen board in the vein of the real-world game Labyrinth... or just keeping your clumsy ass from falling over from a serene yoga pose (and any game with a "Penguin Slide" challenge is automatically one to look forward to). Hurts like hell to admit it in almost the same words as the Nintendo ad-wonks, but Wii Fit looks like the "video game" experience that might actually bring the whole family together in literally-healthy ways.

 

World of Goo (Linux, Mac, PC, Wii)
And the Goo Balls march on! After taking home awards in Design Innovation and Technical Excellence at this year's Independent Game Festival awards, developer 2D Boy is poised to have their title be one of the early WiiWare titles this side of the Pacific Ocean. World of Goo is a "physics based puzzle/construction game" where you build sticky structures leading to a pipe that will slurp up the goo. The idea is to grab as many Goo Balls as possible, but the catch is that the stuff you're building is made of Goo, too, so there is a balancing act to perform between absolute structural integrity and limiting your consumption of points. The Wii controls are simple -- pretty much point and click (A) --, but if PC is more your style you can already get a chapter one preview by pre-ordering from 2D Boy's website.

 

Samba de Amigo (Wii)
Something about this game just shouts instant comeback. The set-up is the same as the original game with high, medium, and low shaking points on both your left and right, quick pose moments (enough in sequence and you could send messages via semaphore), and Hustle Mode (featuring shaking during poses for a 'dancier' experience) all included. This time, though, you won't need a special maraca peripheral because, y'know, Wiimotes! Having the rattle noise come through the speakers is perfect, but if you don't have enough remotes, a nunchuck will work for your second hand. Five levels of difficulty, over forty songs, co-op and competitive for two players, plus the return of Amigo? Hope your Miis are ready to shake it!

 

pOp (Wii)
Another early WiiWare title, pOp is one of those games that looks like something you could try for two minutes and blow off... but then you find yourself still bursting bubbles in a furious combo streak an hour later. As the colored orbs float across the screen, players point and pop with the A button. Getting chains of the same color will increase your chances of finding power-ups like score multipliers, a cursor shrinker/grower, or a shock move to stun the up three other players. If you hold A and shake the remote, you'll start pumping it up so that when you finally let go it explode so violently that nearby bubbles will pop, too. There are four modes for varying levels of difficulty ranging from advanced with a stricter timing system, to chill with no timer or score at all. Playing by yourself for badges (like Achievements) is pretty zen, while four player creates absolute chaos. That chaos factor is what makes pOp so promising as a party game.

 

Mario Kart Wii (Wii)
Mario Kart Wii totally validates the way your Mom tried to play in 1992 when the original SNES game first came out. Just put the wheel in her hands this time, and she'll be great. Not only is the motion control for this game workable, but it's actually fun, too. The power slide move has been relocated from the shoulder buttons to a B trigger extension on the back of the wheel. It feels good, but the learning curve definitely kicks in once you're steering in a slide. That said, the power boost move has been altered to a duration-based system rather than the analogue stick flicking of previous iterations, so you don't have to worry about any crazy back and forth steering. During our session we unlocked Rosalina from Super Mario Galaxy, tried out some of the new courses like Wario's Gold Mine and Toad's Factory, and popped wheelies on the new motorbikes. Overall, Mario Kart Wii seems like it will offer a sweet mix of classic features and new ones (most importantly, Wi-Fi multiplayer for 12) come the oh-so-soon ship date of April 27.

 

Lost Winds (Wii)
In Frontier's WiiWare platforming adventure you play as Toku, a cute little boy who finds a shard of Enril, the wind spirit, who was trapped along with the Sun and Moon (and power hungry) spirit, Balasar, in a Spirit Stone after helping to seal him up. Unfortunately Balasar got very cranky, escaped, and plans to make the inhabitants of Mystralis pay for keeping him cooped up. Toku can save the day if you can harness the power of the wind via Wii remote. After you find the first shard you'll only be able to manage a minor gust by holding A and waving the direction you want it to go, but eventually you'll be able to draw paths for a breeze to follow (to blow fire or water around, or ride with your cape) and make objects hover by drawing circles around them. The controls take a little getting used to, since instead of jumping you're always blowing yourself around, but once we got our hands on it, we realized it wasn't as hard as it looked.

 

Space Invaders Extreme (DS, PSP)
Okay, there have certainly been some pretty shameless, lame, moneygrubbing, sadass-excuse-for-'nostalgia' reworks of classic video games in years past (do you know anybody who actually paid money for the turd-polish of Pong some years back?) but thankfully, this doesn't look like one of them. Landing on Earth for the Nintendo DS and Sony PSP just in time for its namesake classic's 30th Anniversary, Space Invaders Extreme brings it with radically enhanced graphics and background animations and pulsing technogroove music synched to gameplay. Actual gameplay, meanwhile, is a very new beast, featuring new twists like mid-level mini-games, 10X score-multiplier "breaks," inter-level Boss enemies, all-new types of Invader behaviors, and even multiplayer. Space Invaders Extreme hits for both platforms in June 2008.

 

My Weight Loss Coach (DS)
The latest in lifestyle software for the DS, My Weight Loss Coach encourages players to live healthily... and walk more than average. In fact, they include a pedometer with the game, which somewhat ingeniously plugs into the GBA slot and uploads your data at the end of the day. Your personal passport (one per card, since there is only one pedometer anyhow) keeps track of your steps over time and will compare your overall distance, with say, the Great Wall of China. No word on whether you can walk to the moon. Additionally, you do quizzes to test your nutritional knowledge, track your other exercise and diet information, and do your best to fulfill challenges put to you by the game's cute coach (male or female depending on your profile). Software and pedometer ship as a $40 bundle this September.

 

Star Wars: The Force Unleashed (Wii; alternate versions on PS3 and Xbox 360)
There is plenty of buzz surrounding the tale of Darth Vader's secret apprentice and all the fancy physics involved in the 360 and PS3 releases, but at the Nintendo event, we naturally went hands on with the Wii version. While they gave us a peek at single player, including an AT-ST mid-boss fight, the exclusive Duel Mode was actually playable with some 27 available characters. There are nine arenas, and of course they all feature plenty of big heavy objects to toss around with your Force powers (Z and analogue in the direction you want to fling). Of course, you can also just grab your opponent and hammer them into the ground -- a Wii-exclusive move. To just do a Force push, you literally push with the nunchuck. All your lightsaber moves are tied to the Wiimote, and if you hold A and rotate 90 degrees you can block even the electric bolts (thrown with the C button.) It seems a lot more overwhelming than it is -- You'll find yourself able to pull of some cool combos after just a minute or two of acclimation. Duel Mode definitely makes the Wii version worth considering when all the versions of the game ship on Sept 16.

 

Boom Blox (Wii)
EA and Steven Spielberg join forces and this is what they came up with? Well, we got the chance to jump in on a four player game, a mode where you had to throw baseballs (or sometimes bowling balls--maybe there are others as well?) at numbered blocks and knock them off a tower. Any number you knocked off was added to your point total, so obviously there was a huge incentive to go big and try to take the whole thing down, or at least see-saw fling a couple by pegging a block sticking out below. By holding down B and moving your cursor around the screen you can get the perfect angle, at which point you hold A to lock your target. How fast the ball flies seemed to depend both on how fast you "threw" and whether you released A at the appropriate time. Underhand tosses worked quite well! There are also a variety of other modes that we didn't check out, including one that looks like a color-coded version of Jenga. Boom Blox seems destined to be an instant multiplayer hit when it ships on May 6.

 

Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People (Wii)
Telltale (of recent Sam & Max fame) recently announced their episodic WiiWare title based in the HomeStar Runner world and we got a taste of the first episode (slated for a June release), where HomeStar is charged with public nudity and refuses to get off Strong Bad's couch until things are cleared up. There will be five episodes in the series, with scripts edited and ad-libbed upon by The Chapman brothers themselves. Telltale told us there will be a balance between plot and "things to poke on," which mirrors the way Strong Bad e-mails have Easter egg bits to click. Puzzles, mini-games, and Teen Girl Squad comic creation using collectable sketches scattered throughout the environment will all play a part in this title that is sure to please HomeStar Runner fans. Even just the title is spot-on.

 

Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: My Life As a King (Wii)
Square Enix took a bit of a different approach to the RPG for their WiiWare title: they made a sim. Players take the role of King Leo, youngest son of an exiled ruler, and help him rebuild a town by using crystal power; i.e. instead of being an adventurer, you're the guy with the crown who sends them out to fight. Even though you don't see any of it happening, battles are being waged, and when something important occurs, a pop-up message in the upper-right of the screen will let you know. If you send your fighters into too harsh a dungeon, they might die, but we've been told they recover after a couple days. Instead of just letting them suffer, you should help them out by building a weapon shop so they can better equip themselves and researching more types of magic. Even civilian shops are handy, since they boost morale. While the game is complete on its own (set to release sometime around the spring/summer transition) it sounds like Square Enix is planning some downloadable content for people who really get into it. Despite looking just like a Crystal Chronicle game, with such adorable characters, it's a lot different than most of their offerings so it'll be interesting to see if the RPG crowd will warm up to running a town.

 

Major League Eating: The Game (Wii)
Sooooo many people are going to look at the title of this game and ignore it because they don't know what to think. Major League Eating? You mean like the hot dog scarfing guys? Yes, not to mention ribs, corn, hard-boiled eggs, ramen, hamburgers, cranberry sauce, and just about anything else you can cram down your throat. The game features ten actual eaters and twelve different foods to master. First, you need to get the food in your character's mouth, and this part changes depending on what type of food. Small items can be popped with a flick of your wrist, while something like watermelon requires holding the remote horizontally and moving it side-to-side. Once your mouth is full, you can bring your teeth down by pressing the b button when a cursor moves over a bite of food, making sure not to bite your tongue. The key is to balance cramming and chewing in such a way that you are always busy, while also taking care to settle your stomach every once in a while so your character doesn't graphically puke all over everything. Sometimes you'll earn special moves like a burp that will stun your opponent, and as if that isn't goofy enough there are mini-game breaks where you play hot potato. While the concept still strikes us all as a bit weird, the gameplay is frantic fun. Look for it on WiiWare soon.

As a footnote, anyone see the irony of competitive eating and fitness games sharing the same space?